Cafe Camarano

The Medal Ceremony

The Medal Ceremony

As the Olympics draw to a close it is time to reflect back on all the drama, elation and of course the agony of defeat. So I thought I would award my own Olympic medals in the event that I affectionately call…Flops, Drops, and Rolls!

The first gold medal tonight goes to the biggest Flop of the Winter Olympics. The hands down winner here is Bode Miller. While Bode has never been at a loss for words when talking about himself including the stunning revelation that he often competes while under the influence of Alcohol he seems to have come up short in figuring out why he has had difficulty finishing the races let alone winning one. Perhaps its because of his new found sobriety. The Silver Medal goes to Michael Weir. I know he refers to himself as a Diva, but Diva’s don’t ride buses and if they do then they generally make them on time. The Bronze medal goes to Michele Kwan. Another Diva that stomped and cried until she got an exemption to be here even though she knew she wasn’t capable of competing.

The Gold Medal for Shut up and sit down goes to Shani Davis. Shani you may compete in an individual sport you are still part of a team. The team needs should come before your own that’s what being part of a team is about. The Silver Medal goes to Chad Hendricks. Your supposed to be the leader of the team Chaddy so lead. Stop talking to the cameras, pull your teammate aside and have it out off camera then shut up and get over it. The Bronze goes to my boy Michael Weir. Michael you choked like a dog on a chicken bone. Maybe next time you can spend more time making sure you are prepared for your event and less time naming your costume.

The Homer Simpson D’ohh medals go to: Gold to Lindsey Jacobellis for showboating before crossing the finish line. Silver Goes to the women’s hockey for looking past Sweden. Bronze goes to the Austrian cross country squad who chose to stay outside of the Olympic Village in order that they could sneak their banned coach and his illegal medical equipment in but by doing so allowed the Italian police to perform a drug bust style raid!

Finally, The Way To Go Medals which since they display the true spirit of the Olympics are always Gold. I give one to Lindsey Kildow who after taking a horrendous spill sucked it up and still competed in her other events. One goes to Ted Ligety for showing up skiing and winning without running his yap. Not only that but I heard he has also donated his cash prize to some relief fund. It is unfortunate that the talking heads can only bore us with the bad news instead of relating some of the good news to be had. However, overall I give this Winter Olympics a Bronze medal for entertainment and the Italians a Silver as hosts.

posted by Flashy @ 12:58 PM